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Author Topic: Clan Engu of the Western Shores  (Read 14454 times)
Geckilian
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NuraSen'Malog


« Reply #15 on: May 09, 2011, 04:36:21 pm »

Apologies for not commenting on here earlier! A very interesting read HN, and I especially like how you've introduced several new terms and names in to the info without it seeming artificial. The extra details about local delicacies and fishing techniques is a good touch and helps bring the region to life.

I'm looking forward to reading the descriptions of the dwellings as they'll be on a cliff - will they have burrowed down in to it and out of the side, affording some burrows with a nice sea view towards where Enar may be?
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Carcharoth
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« Reply #16 on: May 09, 2011, 07:00:36 pm »

Ive just had a good read and I like the feel of it. The fubarnii of that north-western region are a large, hardy breed who tower over their cousins in the central empire, and even more so over the Dhogu (who they have a general dislike of - they see the Dhogu as weasley thieves and backstabbers, while the Dhogu see them as large and brutish. There is some truth in both perspectives).

The food along the coast will also include a lot of seaweed type stuff - fubarnii are very much omnivores and only rarely eat meat. Possibly the Engu eat a higher proportion of fish, but there will still be a lot of greens and mushrooms.

The big island on the map may or may not be the one you are referring to... If it isn't then I'll add another island to keep you happy  Smiley

In game terms I imagine the Engu wouldn't have herders. They would have standard knights and militia as well as some larger more solid fubarnii.I'm considering javelin throwers as well...
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Megatron0
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« Reply #17 on: May 09, 2011, 07:20:06 pm »

I like the whole feel of this area. It has great character and is written very well.
Also as a clan of fish eaters as well I support this Cheesy
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Lost Egg
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« Reply #18 on: May 09, 2011, 08:24:58 pm »

Thanks for the notes Mike, I have tried to include it all.

I have just added Dwellings, The Clan & History of the Clan as well as added a bit to the last paragraph on Trade to include sea weed Cheesy

I have hinted at a few things which I should hopefully be covering later this week.

HN
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Carcharoth
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« Reply #19 on: May 09, 2011, 08:49:12 pm »

Checking my notes, that city is Tonueil. No sure if that is the right name, so it's still flexible...
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Geckilian
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NuraSen'Malog


« Reply #20 on: May 09, 2011, 08:57:06 pm »

Have to admit I smiled when I read the cliff face was studded with balconies and good views, seems like many fubarnii appreciate a good view from high up!
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Carcharoth
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« Reply #21 on: May 09, 2011, 09:44:22 pm »

I think the tunnels are probably natural rather than excavated. I imagine that everything fits in and around the natural features. How does that sound? Does that fit the image? I always wanted some buildings set in cliffs similar to those they have in Mesa Verde. The only issue with cliffs facing the sea is they aren't very well protected and tend to change.
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Lost Egg
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« Reply #22 on: May 09, 2011, 09:58:59 pm »

I quite like Tonueil sounds a bit more exotic but not OTT. Might change it..

Natural tunnels sounds good, especially if a lot of water comes down the mountains etc from the big thaw each year. Perhaps the cliff with the city has a lot of rocks below to help break up and lessen the power of the waves. Or it has a pre-cliff in front that gets eroded instead.

I think everyone likes a high-up view, it's the whole...I can see your house from here...

HN
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Lost Egg
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« Reply #23 on: May 10, 2011, 07:58:01 pm »

Just tweaked a bit to incorporate your comments Mike. I have also changed the name of the city to Tonueil but the port on Gethal is now called Argor instead. The updated bits are highlighted in red.

HN
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Geckilian
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NuraSen'Malog


« Reply #24 on: May 10, 2011, 08:01:35 pm »

You may want to colour the writing, as opposed to highlighting it - that red is quite uncomfortable to read, I had to highlight it for it to be discernable.
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Lost Egg
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« Reply #25 on: May 10, 2011, 08:26:51 pm »

Good point Geck, tis changed!

HN
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Lost Egg
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« Reply #26 on: May 12, 2011, 08:57:53 pm »

Just added a Military section as well as a couple of sketches. I will probably work on the Devanu page now then come back to this one.

Feel free to comment as always! Smiley

HN
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Carcharoth
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« Reply #27 on: May 12, 2011, 10:25:56 pm »

Loving the little sketches - they really bring it to life  Smiley

For reference, 'Argor' is a compass direction. I'm trying to think which direction, but my memory is failing me... West would make sense, but I think I was awkward and it isn't as simple as that... No worries having a town named that though!
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Lost Egg
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« Reply #28 on: May 13, 2011, 06:50:38 am »

Cheers Mike.

Yep, I got it from the proto dictionary. Its also the name of the first month of summer. I suppose its fitting the port is named west now instead of the city as its the most westerly location on the map.

HN
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Megatron0
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« Reply #29 on: May 13, 2011, 07:37:20 am »

Im lovin the pics! great stuff Cheesy
 
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